The Fork in The Road

THEME: My way or His Highway

This is a tricky subject for me, as Pastor Dan’s message this week was like an arrow

between the eyes. Do not get me wrong, I love and embrace the topic of surrender. I

speak of it often and believe it is the center of our sanctification. We must die to

ourselves and allow the Holy Spirit to live through us. That is, until someone betrays my

trust or wrongs me by being ungrateful. Then it is all prideful hands-on-deck, sound the

ego alarm, and man the guns of revenge and getting even. 

Am I the only one? I must be. Do not cut me off on the road or take advantage of my

love or generosity. 

You see, before the Lord, in His Divine Graciousness and Mercy, plucked me out of the

world where I lived and controlled everything, and you were all my guests, I learned to

enjoy getting even and winning each personal battle. It was a kind of “Game of

Thrones,” in which there was joy in the daily victories. I sadly leaned towards the Jimmy

Hoffa philosophy of, "I do it to them before they do it to me--only worse." Anger would

rage, and the plotting would begin. 

Today, I am no longer that man, thank you, Lord. I am redeemed and being conformed

and formed into the image of Jesus. The Holy Spirit has poured God’s love into my

heart so much that it overflows to all I meet. I long to help anyone in need and, as I see

them, jump to meet them. I am a changed man.

However, this week, I noticed something in me that is a remnant of the man I had been

for so long. I found that I still liked that man a bit and could actually choose the strange

satisfaction of being him over choosing to act in surrender. I see myself standing at a

fork in the road, knowing what I am called to do, yet wanting to feel the personal

exhilaration of acting as I remember. The sad part is that, if I think back hard enough,

through the weeds of satisfaction that Satan uses to blind me, those acts of revenge

provided only fleeting satisfaction, followed by lengthy remorse or a spiral of more

vengeful actions. Yet, as I look down that road, all I see now is instant gratification. As I

write this, I am looking down both roads, knowing what I must do, yet leaning towards

doing the other, and knowing my choice will profoundly affect who I am. 

Allow me to share a story, as was once told by Corrie Ten Boom. 

“Up in that church tower, [the pastor] said, nodding out the window, 'is a bell which is

rung by pulling on a rope. But you know what? After the sexton lets go of the rope, the

bell keeps swinging. First ding then dong. Slower and slower until there’s a

final dong and it stops.'

“I believe the same thing is true of forgiveness. When we forgive someone, we take our

hand off the rope. But if we’ve been tugging at our grievances for a long time, we

mustn’t be surprised if the old angry thoughts keep coming for a while. They’re just the

ding-dongs of the old bell slowing down.” — Corrie Ten Boom, November 1972)

I am experiencing the dings and dongs of years living as the one who believed he was

in charge. Right now, I can choose to grab hold of that rope again and give it a great tug

or fold my hands in prayer and allow my Lord and Savior to be in control and to continue

to stop the ringing of my past and finally quiet my spirit. 

Despite my temptation and desire to be personally and at once gratified, I will fold my

hands, walk away from the rope, and surrender to Him who forgave me when I was His

enemy. Thank God!

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‬‬‬‬‬‬‬‬‬‬‬‬‬‬‬‬‬‬SCRIPTURE: ‬ Colossians 3:13 (NIV‬‬‬‬‬‬‬‬‬‬‬)

“Bear with each other and forgive one another if any of you has a grievance against

someone. Forgive as the Lord forgave you.”

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PRAYER:

Lord, following you has twists and turns and is a journey that uncovers things about you

and me around every turn. Just when we think we have it all figured out, when the road

becomes straight and smooth, there is a hole or a turn onto a scary, new path. Each

time, what we think we are or hold tightly, is no longer true, and we must confront that

new reality or hidden danger. Life can be so frustrating, Lord, and I cannot imagine

walking this path without you, above it all and warning me of what lies around the next

bend. Lord, let me always choose surrender over instant gratification. In Jesus’ name,

Amen